Surviving the Grey Days of Winter

MaryBeth Eberhard shares strategies moms can use to help their families live gracefully during this dreary season.

I am not native to the Midwest. I grew up in upstate New York, where we trick-or-treat in snowsuits and keep sleds in our second-story bedrooms as the snow fall can get that high. Living here for over a couple decades has made me an honorary Buckeye, I hope. Over the years, I have learned that these months of winter are an Ohioan’s version of hunkering down. Like squirrels, we gather our supplies and settle in.

In the fall, I find myself visiting my local Amish market as I stock the pantry with and all the necessary baking supplies: beans, grains, and dried fruit and make sure my deep freezer is filled with meat. Our tables and counters become scattered with books, crafts, and board games. We wear more layers, which means we have more laundry. Children grow restless from being inside with rain and slush, which leads to forts and plays and puzzles.

As my children get more creative, the visits to urgent care grow more frequent. Mattress diving, sumo wrestling, I once had a child get injured by a balloon. A balloon! Going to urgent care is like a family reunion for us with nurses, doctors, and the x-ray technicians. You never know will be on the schedule that day! One of our dear friends who is a nurse at the local hospital and has stood in as an auntie over the years for my kids has been known to say “ I am not going to Urgent care today, so plan your day accordingly!” I think she tempts the fates.

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It is easy to see these months as stress and mess. Let's live them with grace and breath and fill them with memories. #catholicmom

It is easy to see these months as stress and mess. We’ve just come down from a season of preparing. Preparing our hearts and home for the arrival of the Christ child. We have celebrated with feast after feast (and dishes and more dishes). It was all so beautiful and now we are left with these months of grey. We need a break. But how? I have often struggled with what to do as I set the stage for the emotions in our home. Remembering that role helps me set the stage for myself and my family to live these months with grace and breath and to fill them with memories. Here are a few we have been practicing this season over at the Eberhard home.

From mess to blessed.

It’s easy to see the toys, games, puzzles, and books as clutter and another to-do item. I am embracing the to-do item as just that: not one to do as in for me to clean up, but one for me to do, as in participate. I am learning to join in the fun and make the memories. From snow angels to Marion Brothers marathons, I am challenging myself to join in.

Go outside.

Fresh air makes it all better. I have been taking walks after dinner in the dusk. Sometimes alone, sometimes with a little or older hand tucked into mine. When my children were little we called them Listening Walks. No talking, just listening. The other night I took a Listening Walk with my daughter Sarah. We brought a flashlight and headed out in the dark. We heard the snow falling, felt it upon our faces, saw the stars bright in our country sky. My family is learning that when I step away like this, it is to gather my thoughts and recollect. To come along is a special invitation into my quiet world. I smile as I type this because it just feels sacred. We need sacred moments of connecting outside the busy.

Go down memory lane.

We have recently embraced the second wave of Star Wars, Narnia, Harry Potter, Anne of Green Gables, and Jane Austen. We read the books and settle in with big bowls of popcorn for our movie marathons. Younger kids get sleeping bags, older ones grab a blanket and a pillow. My husband has the amazing gift of bringing out the morality of each book and movie and discussion go on by the fire for hours.

Make a pot of soup!

It has always been very important to me that all my children know how to cook, even those who are not able to use their hands. Making a big pot of soup and having the kids help chop, stir, and smell gives them such a feeling of accomplishment. Tasks like these that have to get done anyway, are often ones that I use as opportunities to be more intentional. I force myself now to step back and let my older ones be more creative. They are really accomplished! Make a few loaves of bread and let everyone sit and appreciate the work of their hands, We are a people of breaking bread. Reminding ourselves of that in these simple ways helps us sit back and embrace our heritage and call it good.

Call in reinforcements!

A new face is always a welcome guest in our home. A known face is even more so. Even during this time of COVID, many of us are fortunate enough to have a couple people in our “pod” whom we can invite over. Use this time to either have a card tournament or play a longer board game or as an opportunity for a date night with your spouse. My heart is always full when I see people leaving our home smiling after a visit because I know the grace goes both ways. Our hearts have also been filled.

*The most important part is to pray for the ability to live in joy in the moment. Being thankful for what we have been given and using all of it to form our hearts closer to one another and to the Lord helps build a family culture of joy and laughter, and laughter warms up any cold winter day.

Copyright 2021 MaryBeth Eberhard
Image: Pixabay (2014)